Category Archives: College Football

Mispronunciations and $90 Dollar Pizzas: Liveblog of the Cotton Bowl from JerryWorld

Since WordPress is a fascist regime that frowns upon the public demonstrations of opposition and the use of certain liveblog applications, Ill be Live Tweeting the Cotton Bowl festivities over at the FOTP Twitter.  Stop by, for no other reason than to have an annotated list of corrections for all of the names and factual information that Pat Summerall is sure to blow through with all of the gusto of a man with little time left and little to lose and a live mic in his hand possesses.

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Pirates Everywhre Are A Little On Edge These Days

It seems that the Mike Leach fiasco has men of the swashbuckling persuasion everywhere in a fighting mood.  Such was the case this afternoon at the AutoZone Liberty Bowl Luncheon where two East Carolina players, Running Back Jonathan and a yet-to-be-named Pirate, got into a fight with each other (Pirates have never been known to be a loyal lot), turning over a table at the luncheon in the process.

The lesson, as always, Angry Pirates will lead to some sort of violence.

UPDATE:  The fight was over dessert.  Not for nothing, banana bread pudding in Memphis is usually deliscious.

[via Jorday Stuckey and WoW]

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Look at the Balls on Idaho, Will Ya

Idaho Coach Robb Akey (who sounds incredibly like Michael P.S. Hayes) has large stones, as so aptly demonstrated by his team’s willingness to stare certain defeat square in the eyes and laugh at it’s general insinuation that the game is over.  While the most overt display of enlarged genitalia,was evident during the waning moments of the game, Bowling Green, and the World, was put on notice much earlier in the contest.

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Adam James Documents His Closeting

Last night this video was “leaked” to ESPN and other outlets allegedly showing Adam James, concussed Red Raider, isolated in his own personal hell…or a roomy media area.  While the video seems legit, as The Sporting Blog points out, the poster of the video on YouTube, one Spaethcom8181, could be conveniently linked to Spaethcom.com, which just so happens to be a Dallas-based PR firm.  Seems the James family, in their vaunted efforts to sully the good name of the Dread Pirate, have brought in professionals to do the job.  As if ESPN’s one sided coverage of the situation wasn;t enough.

Sidenote: Who would have a cell phone at practice and wear a head band even though he wasn’t participating?

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Mike Leach Now A Pirate Captain Without a Ship

Mike Leach was summarily fired by Texas Tech moments ago.  This, the final straw onto the back of a camel that had been taking on a substantial load over the past few days.  The action now leaves Texas Tech and the Red Raider players, who for the most part were backing Leach, without a head coach,  leaves Mike Leach unemployed for the moment with a wrongful termination suit all but filed to the proper courts, and has ADs with head coach openings (and some without, currently) contemplating bringing the Dread Pirate in.

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Adam James Would Not Make a Good POW

A local Lubbock television station went all investigative on Adam James’ claims that he was forced by Texas Tech Head Coach Mike Leach to be confined in cramped spaces during his most concussed of times while the rest of the team practiced.  The report exposed that the “shed” and “closet” that  James claims he was forced to stand in as a little bit more than the accusations were letting on.  Look at those things…I’ve lived in more confined spaces…with less amenities.  And after watching that, I’ve gotta ask…how big of a panty waist is Adam James!? (I love working blue, sorry about that).  If the experience of having to be relegated to stand in those spaces during practice was cruel and unusual punishment, I’d hate to hear his thoughts about the room being less than a perfect 72 degrees or his complaints about the lack of sufficient ice in his Gatorade. 

Lets also assume that young squire James is not a fraternity man, because I’d hate to see what types of holy hell death penalty probation that house would be under after the smallest bit of hazing.  I was once locked in a fraternity room closet for over three hours as velvet sounds of George Strait’s “Amarillo by Morning” was played repeatedly for the duration.  And you know what, Im a better man for it, and I also now have a deeper understanding of what it means to to not be rich but be free.  I suspect James does not.

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Mike Leach Puts His Litigatin’ Pirate Hat On

You can officially categorize the dust up between Mike Leach and Texas Tech over his treatment of Adam James (and by treatment I mean putting him in timeout in an equipment shed and a closet with the lights off) as “ugly”.  The Dread Pirate, through his attorney (who I desperately hope hears an eye patch during court proceedings) will be seeking injunctive relief in order to reinstate him as Head Coach.  This is only going to get more tenuous as the days and court sessions go by…and by tenuous, I mean awesome.